SWP Signs

Yesterday saw Shaun Wright-Phillips, step-son of Ian Wright (Wright Wright) sign in a £21m deal with Manchester City.

A massive sum for a garden gnome, but he does have some skill, although whether it is enough to break into the team infront of Duff, Robben and Joe Cole we'll have to wait and see.

The options it does give us are great though. At the end of last season, it's easy to forget that we had no defenders fit and with Robben out, and Duff exhausted, we lost some of the flair we'd built up before Christmas.

Now it's only Essien left to get. Again we're being held to ransom, mainly because of the ridiculous decision last season to buy Drogba for a stupidly inflated price. Now every club in the world thinks we will pay their own crazy estimates for their players. We should leave Essien in a team he has publically stated he does not want to play for. It's just a shame we didn't do that with Drogba too!

Harry Potter: The Half-wit and the Ponce

It's that wonderful time of the year again when you can get onto a packed commuter train or tube in the morning and find it jammed full of people reading childrens books. Yes, those pathetic tossers who bang on about how great Harry Potter is are blessed with a new volume....The Half-wit and the Ponce.

Wake up and look at yourselves. You're reading fucking kids books. What's next? Dishing out colouring books instead of the Metro?

Besides, if you want to read about fantasy, magic potions and crazy animals, you only need a copy of The Sun.